Underperformance Feedback You Disagree With

Welcome to Sticky Situations, where your office dilemmas turn into productive leadership learnings. Each edition, we’ll feature a situation submitted by you, with our advice on how to approach it. There’s no shortage of sticky stuff at work, so let’s get into it.

The Situation

I was told I am having performance concerns after a decade of solid performance, and I do not feel good about it. It’s hard to understand what caused this suddenly and how to handle this situation. If I have to leave, the job market is tough these days.

My Take

First, it sucks to be caught off guard with tough feedback, especially if it is now suddenly a performance concern. Here’s how we would handle this:

Schedule time with your manager to review the feedback. Ask for examples and ask clarifying questions to ensure you understand where the performance concerns are. Try to understand and get clarity versus react or defend.

• “I’d like to better understand the feedback so I can respond thoughtfully. Can we walk through the specific areas where expectations aren’t being met?”

• “Can you give me specific examples where you saw this?”

• “What would good look like in this example?”

• If it feels contradictory to previous feedback, “I’ve always prided myself on delivering strong results, so this came as a surprise. Can you help me understand what shifted recently in expectations or perception?”

You can still disagree with the feedback, but first ask yourself if there is even a kernel of validity to it. Even if you hate the way it was delivered, is there any truth to it?

If you don’t get satisfactory answers in the moment, ask for a follow-up time (you should proactively follow up). If you still don’t get answers, consider engaging HR if they are not already involved.

Engage a trusted mentor, friend, coach, or former manager - someone who is a 3rd party - to give you perspective. Do not let things fester in your head. You will have a lot of thoughts, assumptions, and feelings that may cloud your judgment. Having a place to safely communicate those will help you think more clearly and approach the situation more productively. This can also be a good place to vet if you are being treated fairly.

If you wish to stay in the short-term, identify the plan. Your manager may already present this to you if it is a performance issue. Ask for a clear improvement plan (timeline, expectations, metrics, check-ins) AND understand what happens if you don’t meet the plan.

Take this opportunity to think about what you want to do next and what environments you thrive in. Was this role/team/manager a good fit for your strengths and how you like to work? What about it did you like and what should you avoid?

Get your resume and story in order now. This situation is one blip in your entire career story. Do not discount the experience, accomplishments, and strengths you have. Not every job or manager is going to be a slam dunk, but you will learn a lot about yourself and what you value from it. Even though the market feels tough right now, having a clear focus on what you want and engaging your network will give you a headstart.

Please don’t be the manager in this situation. This can be avoided through timely feedback with your directs. Even if the problem seems small in the moment, it’s worth discussing candidly to ensure the employee has time to work on the area and is aware of expectations. When giving feedback, share specific examples and use explicit, plain language on how severe or urgent the feedback is. This avoids surprises come review season and gives a clearer level of motivation to the employee. Sugar coating or sandwiching feedback minimizes the impact and can be confusing.

• “This did not meet expectations for this level. Here’s what ‘good’ looks like…”

• “If this continues, it will impact your performance given how critical of a skill this is for the role.”

You will undoubtedly have to give tough feedback and deal with underperformance in your management tenure, and you can do so with positive intent and transparency.

Would you handle it differently?